Family Days Out offers with MoneySupermarket.com

Another Bank Holiday and half term break is looming and, like many parents, I’m thinking where and how to amuse the children next week.

An important aspect, in this current economic climate, is cost and this is why I was pleased to receive this information from MoneySupermarket.com which contains details of money saving offers for Family Days Out all over the country.

Here’s some information:

With the Spring bank holiday weekend looming, it can be hard to make your mind up how to keep the family entertained for that extra day with an exciting trip.

With family budgets stretched further than ever, it can be expensive taking the family out for the day, so we’ve come up with some great offers to help you make the most of Spring bank holiday without breaking the bank!

In the below infographic you’ll find a variety of suggestions for great days out all over the country to help you find somewhere for that perfect family day out. We’ve also revealed the results of a survey we carried out in which we asked over 70 parenting bloggers about their family habits for days out.

To get the great deals featured in the infographic below, or for further information, visit our Deals and Vouchers channel (click here).

Obviously, as a special needs family, we are limited to where my children will feel comfortable going – their ideal scenario is an attraction with zero queuing and not many people – but the money-saving information was too useful not to share!

Enjoy the bank holiday!

Blogging and personal boundaries

Sometimes I feel constricted by my blog. At other times I’ve grateful for it.

I’ve chosen to blog relatively anonymously for my children. I include pictures to demonstrate that autism cannot be seen, one of my first and favourite posts is The Camera DOES lie, it demonstrates that point effectively (even though I say so myself!). I refer to them by their initials to protect their privacy, as they are growing up, I’m limiting the pictures I do use to mostly head and shoulders shots.

And even though I do so relatively anonymously I received feedback early on from people I knew saying I shouldn’t be including pictures of the children etc, etc. People who might know us but didn’t understand autism. I chose to ignore.

Sometimes there are situations I want to blog, but don’t. Sometimes I feel I NEED to blog, to get that therapeutic release, I don’t. Because it’s not appropriate. I know my personal boundaries.

We received the news late yesterday that a family member is ill, very ill. It’s occupied my thoughts tonight and today. I can’t go into details primarily because it’s early days and also because I’m respecting their privacy.

I’ve been thinking today of implications and timescales, something you automatically do when news like this reaches you. I know I’m being vague but it’s intentional.

Please bear with me Jx

Pettiness amongst proudness

As regular readers will know, last night the family attended a presentation evening hosted by the East Berkshire Football League, in honour of the season just ended.

It was a busy, packed room – as you can imagine – with 7 divisions in the Under 10′s age group to be honoured, Champions, Runners Up and Fair Play awards for each division.

For every player attending last night, it must have been very exciting. Certainly T has been counting down ever since his team were announced as Champions in their league, and even beforehand, as he’d been working out the permutations of every game. A time for pride, a time for players, managers, coaches and players families to enjoy the evening.

The vice-chairman opened the evening and after an intro detailing the numbers of teams and players involved, he mentioned the Respect code of conduct.. Aimed at the children, he emphasised that anyone boo-ing would be asked to leave, some parents would have been wise to take heed.

They didn’t boo, oh no, they weren’t that obvious but the ones sitting behind us made little petty remarks and digs at all the other teams.

On just a player and manager going up to get a Fair Play award…”haha, couldn’t anyone else be bothered to turn up then”.

On a team who had made the decision to all attend dressed in shirts, trousers and club ties (they looked very smart)…”haha, look at them, some have short sleeves, some have long sleeves, they couldn’t even get that right”.

On a team who had very bright kits…”haha, look at the colour of that”.

Now, maybe they’d “enjoyed” themselves too much in the bar beforehand, maybe they were tired, maybe the dreadful weather outside was annoying them but was that showing Respect and Fair Play? I don’t think so.

All those players were deservedly there for a reason, they’d played in the snow, wind and rain, often Sunday and weekend games to complete the fixtures and they earnt every smile, every round of applause, every trophy.

My little man had his trophy next to him on his pillow last night, it stayed with him on the sofa until the school run and they’ll be reunited at the end of end day. He’s proud and justifiably so. I’m proud of him too and every little man who stood on that stage last night. Wish others felt the same.

In the grand scheme of things….

With everyone that’s gone on this week, it’s quite insignificant really…a blocked washing machine filter isn’t it?

Let me see..there was T’s diagnosis on Tuesday, the confirmation that we have two children on the autistic spectrum – one severe, one high functioning – and then yesterday, an afternoon where D was poked, prodded, blood tested and x-rayed. Challenging enough for anyone, but throw her anxieties and learning difficulties into the mixture and it was a long afternoon.

So, really a washing machine malfunction should be a breeze, shouldn’t it?

Not so, when it occurs at the end of a long, stressful week. Not so when you know that the shirt T is expecting to wear tomorrow is stuck inside, Not so when there is water to manually drain, a kitchen to clear up. It all takes time and has to be done before the children get home, before they notice that something is adversely different, before they worry.

I thought today was going to be calmer, I thought I’d be able to spend it thinking of ways to drum up votes for the BiBs, something that I need to do justice, I’m the only autism blogger in there. Here’s the link to vote btw, I’m in the Commentary section.

But I haven’t. I feel like I’m on a tightrope today, trying to get across. Various things keep trying to knock me off but I won’t let them.

There is no answer but to keep going, appreciating the positive, forgetting any negatives. Grabbing any little bits of respite as and when. Hoping that the blooming machine gets sorted out later and – for the most part – keeping calm and carrying on.

My Little Dreamers – #Prose4T

I’m linking up with Vic Welton for #Prose4T. Have a look at the posts linked up, there’s some lovely diversity on there.

My contribution today is one I wrote for last week but didn’t get around to linking.

It has been, and continues to be, an absolute Rollercoaster of a week this week.

My two children may now both have autism “labels”, this doesn’t mean that they don’t have wishes and dreams like everyone else, just theirs tend to be more pronounced.

My Little Dreamers

My sleeping children, sometimes faintly snoring.
What are you dreaming of, I wonder?

My sports-mad T will dream of GOALs!
Playing as a team, passing, scoring.
Putting on a shirt for England, that’s his dream.
Running out at Wembley, with a proud beam.

My lovely D dreams of flying.
Flying like a butterfly, soaring high.
Dancing over fields of daisies and flowers.
Soaring without a care, in a bright blue sky.

But all too soon the night passes.
Sleepy heads rise, to start another day.
Dreams are forgotten about for the moment,
The school run beckons, off on our way.

#MagicMoments – A Key To The Door

It’s Monday (again, the weeks are flying by) and I’ve linked up with Jaime at oliversmadhouse for #MagicMoments.

My #MagicMoment first happened 9 years ago and carries on daily, to a certain extent.

Whizzing back 9 years and 4 months….
we had a decision to make. We were all living in my little 2 bed terrace with its blue outside (which is how I met Mr Bluecrisps), there was me, Hubbie, 10yr old C, 14 month old T and my belly…5 months away from producing D. We were cramped already, it was time to consider moving from the house which I’d brought with my ex, where C was brought up and where T arrived, in the living room, on the floor (that sounded a bit like Cluedo..guess where the baby arrived).

We had our little house valued and started looking around, I found a house very quickly and phoned up, only to be told the buyers were fed up with a lack of response and going to another agent. I asked if we could still view it with them, he checked with the vendor and came back and said no. Disappointing but I thought maybe it would appear with new agents in the following week.

It did! We went to view it and I fell in love with it. It was perfect, just the right size for us, the garish orange paint everywhere was slightly off-putting, that and the fact the vendor had had a fry-up just before we arrived so there was a greasy-spoon-cafe aroma and feel to the kitchen but..ideal for us.

We put in an offer and said we were putting ours on the market immediately, which we did and we had a firm offer within 6 days. Brilliant, all systems go. My tummy filled with D getting ever bigger.

Then the fun started…

Our buyer went on holiday just as we were about to exchange, without telling anyone, it got better…

Our seller’s wife had a nervous breakdown so he was focused naturally on her well-being and getting what was causing her the stress (the house) sorted as quickly as possible. He would phone us, asking what was going on practically daily. I could only look at my packed boxes and wonder.

At one point we considered halting everything and waiting until after D had arrived, the additional stress was not needed.

Finally, we had a completion date. Our money went through by lunchtime but (typical) our buyer’s hadn’t gone through by then. More phone calls and until you actually hold the keys in your hand, you don’t believe it.

But eventually we got there…

Our home. D was born in our bedroom 6 weeks later, one week early.

There may be times when I cannot stand living next door to who we do – the noise that pounds through the walls on a Saturday evening when they decide to “entertain” and the fact we’re right near a woods used for dog-walking so everyone drives up in their cars to walk their dogs and because they don’t live there, there is a fair amount of p o o.

But it’s our home, the only family home that T and D remember, our joint names on the mortgage.

And that IS difficult some months, keeping everything ticking over on one sporadic self-employed wage, but we do and we will, a secure base for the children.

Because the children have special needs and, particularly D, find certain outdoor environments challenging (she has a severe stranger anxiety), the back garden is their haven. To anyone walking past with its trampoline, apple day bed thingy, climbing frame and framed pool, it might seem like they’re spoilt, to T and D it’s a place to play, to enjoy themselves, to be happy children and that’s always a Magic Moment.

Looking forward to reading some more Moments, thanks for reading Jx 😘

Learning Life Skills

I remember Home Economics in secondary school, not so much for what we learnt, but what we made.

There were various recipes like Pineapple Upside Down cake and, very memorably, Mango Chutney. Memorable because the jar smashed in my book bag and everything was covered with a slimy mango concoction! I can never have poppadoms without being reminded of that smell!

I guess the most important things I gained from those lessons were basic cookery skills, how to make a roux sauce, the components and timings for basic cookery.

I want to pass these skills onto the children, enabling them – in time – to be able to make basic bits and pieces. In D’s case, it’s especially important. I think back to the dementia Coronation Street story where the adult woman tried to make cheese on toast in the toaster, put the toaster under water to wash it and electrocuted herself. Something that if you didn’t know, might be an instinctive reaction to do.

So, I’m starting to compile a folder with basic tips and hints for simple meals and snacks, including – in time – things like making tea and coffee.

I’ve put something in this morning, for baked beans on toast. It sounds easy and instinctive but special needs children find it easier if things are detailed out clearly.

Baked Beans on toast:

You will need:
Two slices of bread, tin of baked beans, knife, fork, plate, breadboard, butter, non-stick saucepan, wooden spoon.

1. Put two slices of toast into the toaster and push the switch down to toast.
2. Open the tin of baked beans and put the beans and sauce from the tin into a non-stick saucepan.
3. Put the pan onto a medium heat on the cooker, put a wooden spoon in the pan.
4. The beans will start to bubble, this means they are cooking. Give them a stir with the wooden spoon. Do not use a metal spoon, it will become too hot.
5. The toast will “pop” in the toaster. Take the toast out carefully and put it on the bread board.
6. Take some butter from the fridge, spread some butter on the toast with a butter knife.
7. Put your buttered toast onto a plate.
8. The beans should now be cooked. Turn off the cooker. The saucepan will be hot.
9. Put an oven glove on to lift the saucepan by its handle and tip the beans on top of the toast on the plate.
10. Enjoy your beans on toast!
11. Now put your dirty plate, knife, fork, saucepan and wooden spoon into the washing up bowl, ready for cleaning later.

There will be pictures too as D responds better to visuals.

She is also very sensory and we always use aprons – John Lewis do some great ones – perfect as she has a tendency to want to wipe her hands immediately down her clothes if any food stuffs get on them.

So, that’s our first recipe in our folder. We’ll be trying out and adding a new one each week or so. Good practice in those all-important life skills for her, reassurance for me.

Disclaimer: This was a sponsored post for which I received a monetary fee. All views and opinions are my own.

Bookworm Wednesday – “Let’s Find Mimi” books by Katherine Lodge

Today’s Bookworm Wednesday books are by Katherine Lodge and are very much along the lines of “Where’s Wally” but for girls. We stumbled across these by accident and they have proved themselves to be very useful in terms of prompting conversation about Mimi and her situations and the many little mice around her.

Here’s what Amazon says about Mimi and the author:

In this exciting “find the mouse in the house book”, follow Mimi from morning to night as she munches her breakfast, gets dressed in her favourite outfit, bakes a cake, enjoys a lunchtime snack, splashes in the bath and, after a fun-filled day, falls fast asleep!

The challenge is on to find Mimi and her family who are hidden in every scene! Can you spot her?

About the Author
Katherine Lodge is the illustrator of several picture books and she recently created the Sasha and Olly series for Simon and Schuster and the Seriously Cute brand for Bloomsbury. Since becoming the mother of two children herself, Katherine has gained a new insight into the preschooler’s world.
The Let’s Find Mimi books are available from Amazon – click on the link for details.

D and I have really enjoyed looking through the pages, sometimes we’ve found Mimi straight away, other times it’s taken longer, much has depended on how much D has been willing to interact. The quest to find Mimi is made easier by the fact she has a red bow and butterfly wings on, all the other mice are bow-less/wing-less.

The books also have a game included too, snakes and ladders in one and a shopping game in the other. We haven’t tried these yet – sometimes D will turn-take, it depends on how her day is going – but we will.

A definite thumbs-up from us for the interaction possibilities and conversation tools.

Thanks for reading Jx 😘

#MagicMoments – Finding Mr Bluecrisps without really looking

I’m linking in with #MagicMoments over at theoliversmadhouse.co.uk again today. We’ve all had very little sleep thanks to D’s suffering from anxieties for most of the night (pass me some coffee please) so it’s good to revisit something and stay positive.

I very nearly didn’t meet Mr Bluecrisps aka Hubbie. At the time, he was the brother of one of my work friends, someone I didn’t know existed until I went into work on a Monday morning and mentioned that I wanted the outside of my house painted.

My fear of heights meant that I’d painted to just above the ground floor windows, but couldn’t do the rest. I currently had a cornflower blue bottom of my little terrace house, with a standard magnolia top. A sort of huge dolly mixture sweet effect.

I’d been a single parent to C for nearly 3 years, asking my ex to paint it was not an option. He refused to pay proper maintenance/any expenses for his son, he certainly wasn’t going to put himself to any trouble with a paintbrush.

That work morning I mentioned my stripy house in passing and my friend said “I’ve got a brother, I’ll ask him to have a look.”

First I’d heard of his existence, from what she then said he sounded like a confirmed bachelor, happily self-employed, being his own boss, able to just take off and travel seeing sports when it suited him. Anyway, I was glad he was able to help and would pay, of course.

The next weekend, a man knocked on my door, a friendly man with a big smile. He painted the outside of the house and then he spoke to my (little at the time) shy C, who had just turned 6. I remember thinking he had a natural way with children and that he’d taken the time to talk to C, but accept that he (C) was shy, he didn’t force answers out of him.

There’d been something about him, the gentle way he spoke to C made me think he was worth getting to know and, over the next few days, I tentatively made enquiries of my friend. She was surprised but delighted – lol – but did warn me that he liked sport, a lot.

This was a big (no, huge) step for me. I’d been single for nearly 3 years – drunken smooches in clubs on a rare night out notwithstanding – but it felt the right thing to do.

We had our first date shortly after that – taking into account an FA cup final (!) – and married on the second anniversary of our first date.

Below is a post I dedicated to him on our anniversary last year:

“Hubbie would probably be very pleased at the title (Mr Bluecrisps) actually, he’s always telling his customers about the blog and he’ll sit there, poised with his phone, ready to read it as soon as I’ve pressed “publish” – why he doesn’t have a sneak preview beforehand I don’t know! Bless him!

I can imagine he’s reading this with “Mr Blue Sky” going through his brain!

Anyway, today (30 May 2012) we’ve been together 12 years and married for 10 years. We married on our second anniversary. In Jersey, on a day as beautiful (but not quite as hot) as today.

Hubbie became on that day a stepfather to C and has proved to be more of a father figure and role model than his birth dad ever was so I’m grateful even if C is going through that *one grunt for yes/no/whatever”‘phrase. It took a course of Clomid to have C so I wasn’t sure if we’d be blessed with any more children, T and D were very welcomed – if not a lovely surprise, both times!

Hubbie is the brother of one of my friends and ex-work colleagues so joining their family was very familiar! He was wonderful with C from the first moment he met him and at subsequent BBQs and parties was the one that the children flocked to to throw cold water over or play football with.

We’ve gone through a lot in the last 10 (or 12) years – marriage, house move (6 weeks before D arrived), two home births, D’s diagnosis, various family and pet deaths, my attack just over a year ago and our elderly parents’ continued ill health but we have each other and our family unit and that what makes us strong.

Hubbie works very hard for us and incredibly protective. I’m his “woman” and he’s my man. Before you think that sounds very anti-feminist I’d better add that for all his masculinity he’s rubbish at DIY and gardening so that’s my role!

Wouldn’t be without him. It was a big step for me as a single mum to take those first tentative baby steps and for him, as a confirmed sport-loving bachelor to take on me and C.

Very glad you did though Mr Bluecrisps. Love you, Mrs Bluecrisps 😘😘”

Strange how one moment can totally change your life isn’t it? If Mr Bluecrisps hadn’t been so considerate with C, I wouldn’t have thought any more about thinking of him in any way other than someone who helped out that morning. Definitely a #MagicMoment!

A silver lining behind that stress cloud

Yesterday was not a good day – click here for my diary post – it didn’t start well and it certainly didn’t continue well.

One of the downsides about D having a dreadful start was that I wasn’t really focused on what I was meant to be doing. I wrote our Bookworm Wednesday and a review, almost halfheartedly, thinking about my girl and whether her day was improving.

I was meant to have an eye test yesterday, I say meant because I got the time wrong. I thought it was 10.20am when it had been 10.00am. Talk about embarrassing! The opticians were very nice about it and said “don’t worry, it happens”. I never, ever get times or dates wrong, I guess I was too distracted.

Part of me was secretly relieved, I think they’ll be telling me I’ll need glasses for the first time. I had Bells Palsy a few years ago
- to read my post on the experience, click here – and the eye on that side of my face is definitely weaker. You wouldn’t know to look at it, but it is.

So, I know but I don’t, if you know what I mean.

Anyway, another appointment has been made for tomorrow and I left feeling a bit of a numpty.

Someone was outside the shops further down, handing out leaflets and I took one. It was only a voucher for a free Specsavers eye test!

The timing couldn’t have been better and obviously, if I’d gone at the right time (but didn’t, doh!) I’d have paid full price.

The chap handing them out must thought it was his lucky day, not only did I thank him but asked for another. Hubbie is due an eye test too.

So, thinking positive, every cloud DOES have a silver lining! Wish me luck for tomorrow though Jx